Last time I was musing on how we get to where we are today. What life lessons do we learn on the way to here?
This feels very prescient as I reflect on the fact that Elder Nearest-and-Dearest is about to launch herself into the adult world of work.
17 years of education come to an end as she finishes university this month and graduates next month.
How do I feel?
I feel astonished. The enormity of all the small steps she has taken to get to this mountain top is dawning on me now.
None of it has happened quickly, and much of it has not been easy.
She is one of the student cohort whose first year happened during the Covid Pandemic. As if that wasn’t enough to deal with, we then had a major family bereavement suddenly and shockingly during her second year.
And accomodation shortages in her city of study raised their ugly head in her third year.
And yet, here we are.
Out the other end, a fantastic degree and a new awareness of who she is and what it means to embrace her chosen niche.
What do you remember about when you first launched into adulthood?
Perhaps you – like me – still feel something of a fraud at this adulting business. Who do I think I am kidding to believe I know anything at all about life?
And yet, once, again, here we are –
So many life lessons.
I am currently finishing another fabulous series of Life Coaching workshops with the charity Home Start. Brilliant people, all of them. More on that here.
What strikes me as I present the material that I have written and developed to this group is that I do actually know what I am talking about. I have my own lived experience to draw on, having been around on this planet for more than half a century.
I also identify that I am learning to reflect on my experiences and choices so that I continue to grow in awareness and knowledge and therefore have something to pass on.
What underpins much of what I do with HomeStart is the fantastic team that make it all happen. The staff and volunteers are so incredibly supportive, non judgemental, empowering and empathic. They go above and beyond to provide whatever support and encouragement is needed. For me, delivering the material that I do, I am simply building on the supportive culture of “You CAN and you ARE” that the team have already created.
What a privilege.
As I consider our Elder one and her long, hard journey to get to today, I am grateful to be able to reflect on the role that MB and I have played in her life. We have tried our best to provide that supportive encouragement, just as the Home Start team do. And I rejoice to consider the supportive foundation of people who have contributed so much to her life – family, friends, God parents, mentors, teachers.
None of us get to where we are in isolation.
We all need people around us to cheer us on, encourage and provide support, serve as sounding boards.
We need people to bear witness to us and our lives and what it is we seek to achieve, however large or small.
If this is a season of major change for you, I am with you in heartfelt awareness of the enormity of the emotions you are facing. Perhaps you have a child starting school, moving up a stage at school, or leaving school. Please read this post and know that you are not alone with all the feelings you are feeling.
Perhaps you are retiring, or changing job. Maybe health issues a bereavement or family dynamics have forced a change on you that is not of your wishing.
Allow yourself time to acknowledge what YOU have achieved to get to today – whatever the nature of the change. You have taken one step after another, learned and grown in the process, and arrive at this season better equipped than you were the last time you faced major change. You have developed and utilised new tools that are now in your arsenal. And you have been able to access your own wisdom as you reflect on your experiences and what it is that you are learning.
I salute you and all those on whose shoulders you have stood.
And I encourage you to be those shoulders for someone who needs that support this week.
And take a minute to read these musings on ending well so that you know you are not alone.